Frustration

Frustration: A feeling of anxiety, dissatisfaction toward not moving forward in resolving an issue or a sudden, unexplainable, uncontrollable action that causes stress, anxiety, and disappointment.

As I’m getting older I would like to think I am getting better at handling my emotions and feelings. You know the whole love, happiness, sadness, joy, excitement and anger routine. We are in control. 50 year olds rule. Fortunately or unfortunately, I realize I do not have a handle on everything. Someone passes the hot potato of life, stuff and hurt, right into your lap and you have to deal with it.  At times, I’m a really good actor winning many Golden Globe Awards with my contagious happy Jesus smile and for knowing the biblical script really well, but on the inside I’m this shadow of an un-transformed, blissfully unaware, why do I feel this way, individual. An individual that causes the Holy Spirit to work overtime, 24/7 inside me

I have to say; it’s not easy searching for clarity on why you feel the way you feel. I realize no matter how strong my relationship is in Christ or how mature I am, frustration is difficult to process and to communicate about. Suddenly something we didn’t expect or see coming; a death in the family, challenge at work, someone doesn’t care, sickness, we find ourselves in the land of the impossible. It’s just a fact of life we all have to face. So where do we start the process?  Do we start praying that the rapture will come and Jesus sucks us up into heaven or better yet Jesus sucks the life out of the person who caused us to feel frustrated? Well, even though both sounds incredibly rewarding it’s probably not the best solution to wait for. So, here is what I’ve learn over the years that helps me through the healing process of frustration:

1. Flip your mental switch toward the positive instead of the negative. Don’t dwell on negative feelings.
2. Always show respect to each other. Getting back at someone is not a choice. Dumping anger, by screaming and yelling at individuals is un-acceptable. This only produces more hurt.
3. Create imaginary boundaries. Think of a thick, tall cement wall and you place those negative feelings behind it. No one can get them out except you. Other people may try to get them out but they can’t unless you let them.
4. Process for positive solutions.
5. Allow God to engage in you. This starts by seeking the scripture, praying (taking it before God), listening (for God whispers) and spending time processing God thoughts and your thoughts. I like what Psalms 1-3 says.  In a nutshell; anyone who meditates upon God’s word becomes deep rooted like a tree, their spirit and soul refreshed, and will bear fruit for everyone to share. I sense God smiling when we do this. He loves that you are seeking Him for solutions and will empower you with His Spirit.
6. Seek counsel if you feel stuck. We all come to the table with a history of dysfunctionality in some form of another. It may be beyond our capabilities. Seek help and support of others.
7. Communicate. Get clarity on information that caused the frustration. You may have misinterpreted what was said. Remember have dialogue with the attitude of humility, forgiveness and with the intention of coming up with solutions.

I recently read a statement that Hellen Keller once said, “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of the trail and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”  It’s a no-brainer that no one wants to go through a broken experience. But it is also obvious we will. Look at your brokenness as a journey toward producing a Christ’s character in you. That kind of attitude will produce fruit for everyone to share.

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